Lightbulbs

In my last week of teaching organizational leadership this semester, my students were asked to make presentations to their classmates surrounding some sort of ethical leadership dilemma. The students were asked to advise the class on what decision should be made by the leaders in the case from an ethical standpoint while paying attention to what made good business, financial, and legal sense. They were then to use the leadership techniques, models, theories, ideas and perspectives from the semester to present a plan of action to address the case.

They did a remarkable job.

In fact, they did such a wonderful job in pulling together all of those pieces, that the presentations gave me new perspectives on a couple of leadership decisions currently facing one of the organizations that I serve as a member of the board of directors. Of course the presentations weren’t perfect. I questioned the accounting on a couple of proposals and some of the ethical justifications were a little weak. Others lacked detail in applying the leadership models we had discussed. All of which gave me one last opportunity to help students make connections to the material as I asked one final set of questions.
And I saw it…

While I was asking those final challenging questions, I saw a couple of final light bulbs come on.

Some were students who had excelled in gathering the information, but had not yet fully put it into practice. Others I had watched struggle to knit the pieces together all semester long. Watching it all begin to click for them is remarkably rewarding. I am so proud in those moments for the students who continue to work until the light finally dawns.

And in those moments, I’m reminded of why I teach leadership. Because they can learn. (Tweet This)

Many of them come with a great deal of leadership potential. Some are naturally influential with their peers. Others are able to speak eloquently and persuasively. Still others think critically and apply ideas readily. But they still need research and theory and practice to really begin to excel in leadership.

Hopefully, my classes give them the opportunity to gain the knowledge they need and to practice in a relatively safe environment.

Though at this point in the semester, I am weary, it is these moments where they succeed in pulling all of the pieces together, that I am inspired anew to

  • Tweak a classroom exercise
  • Find an even better textbook
  • Edit and refine a lecture
  • Try out a new teaching tool or technique

Because I’m not done learning any more than my students. (Tweet This)

So, we’re off to a summer “break” where my reading list is longer than the one I had during the semester.  But maybe I’ll grab a quick nap first.

-ep

Epic Fail!

One of the ways that we learn leadership is by watching others lead. In class, we often look at leadership examples from business, politics, education, and the like to see how they handled difficult situations or unique opportunities. For instance, this semester, my students are reviewing the cases from Michael Useem’s The Leadership Moment as part of our experience together.

There is an always a bit of danger in looking to any human example, because they are…well…

Human.

oopsAnd as members of the human race, we fail. And my students are highly aware of the failures of leaders. Martha Stewart, Lance Armstrong, and Ken Lay are all household names, not because of their leadership successes, but because of their failures.

As Christians, we recognize that some failures in leadership are due to willful sinfulness. This week in class, we’ve been grappling with the difficulties of leading morally and ethically in today’s world. When leaders are faced with divided loyalties, competing values, and multiple stakeholders, leading an organization with ethics and integrity is a complex and challenging prospect.

Of course, some of our failures as leaders aren’t willful, they are quite simply mistakes. As humans we have a limited point of view, limited resources, and limited information. With all those limitations, we are bound to fail from time to time.

And maybe failure’s not all bad. In fact, some have attributed success to the willingness to risk and to fail, especially if we learn from failure.

I think there’s some truth in that idea. When we are never allowed to fail or never risk enough to fail, it’s difficult to ever learn something new. And while as leaders we have to weigh our responsibilities to the various stakeholders involved (ah, those challenges of ethical leadership again), perhaps it is sometimes irresponsible to always avoid risk that might involve failure.

At the very least, we as leaders ought to put into place some sort of practice that allows us to learn from those inevitable failures.

I’ve made it our practice on campus to ask every guest speaker at our leadership events to identify what practices they’ve put in place to help them turn those epic failures into learning opportunities rather than roadblocks. These are some of the things they’ve said:

  • I ask “What do I learn from this?” or “God, who do you want me to become from this?”
  • I keep a journal that helps me keep track of the lessons learned along the way.
  • I make reflective, prayerful evaluation a part of our ongoing process – when we have apparent success and apparent failures.

I’d love to add to our list of best practices in learning from failure. Do you have practices in place that help you turn failures into learning opportunities?

-ep

The Necessity of Reflection

There are many surprising truths I have learned in my semester of blogging—that vulnerability is powerful, that online community can be Bashawtangible and unifying, that bloggers are often on the front lines in the war against injustice and ignorance (and are sometimes the most blatant promoters of injustice and ignorance).

But the greatest thing blogging has taught me is the necessity of reflection.

Reflection is necessary for self-understanding and societal awareness—As human beings living in an age of hyper-technology, we tend to think we are more connected to people and ourselves than we have ever been. We believe that watching 24-hour news, following the latest YouTube trends, and posting our daily activities and random emotions on Facebook make us experts on people, connections, and ourselves. But, in reality, we are less aware of our own feelings and problems and blind to the needs of others because we do not take the time to think, reflect, and write. We fill our heads with the opinions of others and never stop to consider how we feel about those opinions, never process the changes in the world and the changes in our hearts. Reflection is the antidote to ignorance of self and society.

Reflection is necessary for teaching—Since I have only been a full-time professor for two-years , I am clearly not an expert educator. Every day, I make mistakes in my teaching. In academia, however, there is an unwritten rule of “fake it until you make it” (even if you never actually “make it”). We think that in order for students and other teachers to respect us and listen to us, we have be experts, to always be right, to never show weakness. And so we fake knowledge and good teaching until we forget that we are faking and begin to believe that we do know everything. And that makes it hard to know our faults, hard to listen to others, and hard to learn and grow as teachers.

Robert Frost had it right when he wrote, “I talk in order to understand; I teach in order to learn.” Reflecting and talking about myself and my teaching this semester (however narcissistic it may sound), opened my eyes to the areas in which I needed to grow. As I shared these areas for improvement in my blog, I was teaching others. And, beautifully and ironically, what I taught to others was always what I most needed to learn.

Reflection is necessary for faith—It is quite popular these days to talk about faith as a journey. This is far more than a trendy illustration; the idea originally comes from the Bible. In Scripture, we can follow the stories of people of faith, from Abraham to Esther and Levi to Paul, and see that faithful living requires forward movement and a purposed destination.

Faith is moving forward—moving away from the old self and its desires and moving toward the new self, the new kingdom, a new calling. And movement forward does not occur without a radical change in perspective and situation. Abraham’s faith required a geographical shift of epic proportions. Esther’s faith demanded death-defying courage and commitment. Levi’s faith forced a career transfer, from tax-collecting to disciple-making. Paul’s faith necessitated a name change and initiated one of the most significant life transformations in all of history. Faith compels us to change. But we cannot change, cannot move forward, if we do not know who we are and where we are now.

So, reflection is necessary for faith because reflection is necessary for change.

The greatest truth I have learned from blogging is that reflection is what moves us forward; it gives us the tools and time to understand ourselves and our society; it unveils our faults, our inadequacies, and our need for improvement; it forces us to not just have faith but to do faith; it motivates us to follow God’s call, to reform (re-form!) our hearts, and transform, not just our lives, but our world.

 

jgb

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander…

Watch this Video : http://youtu.be/8H48vMYu1J0

Hillsong United – Oceans (Where my feet may fail)

” Spirit Lead me where my trust is without borders

Let me walk upon the waters

Whenever you would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

And my faith will be made stronger

in the presence of the Savior

I will call upon your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in your embrace

For I am yours and you are mine”

This past Sunday I was introduced to this praise and worship song. I remember thinking back to lifeguard training. We would tread water for 20 minutes straight with our hands above the water in-order to get our lifeguard certification. We started with 5 minutes, then we trained for 10 minutes. Eventually, we mastered 20 minutes. This skill was required and needed for life saving purposes. If I was drowning, I would want a lifeguard that could tread for as long as needed.

This reflective process has taught me that we set standards, we prepare our students for what we know they will need, and we implement strategies to help them succeed. But in reality, we can only prepare them for so much. So much more learning must take place through life experiences and outside of class assessment.

At this time in the semester, I see many of the students treading water with their head just above water. I challenge my students to cherish these moments. Let God use these moments to prepare them for the road of life ahead. To one day be the leader that is teaching others. My hope is that these moments they share at this university will help them to dig deeper in their faith. My hope is that God will take the moments and use them to draw closer to him.

My challenge to myself is the same. I am in my own journey of “treading water” and I know God is going to lead me to a deeper place in my faith. He is going to stretch my abilities and give me the ‘required skills needed’ to make a difference.***


Podcast Update

I have been tracking the progress of the students viewing the podcast prior to class. Six out of 16 students are viewing the chapter podcast prior to or after class.  In addition, the same 6 are completing all assignments whereas the other 10 are just not. Conclusions: if students do not turn in assignments, they are also not likely to read, listen to the podcasts, or come prepared to class.

In order to increase in-class participation, I started posting the discussion questions from the podcast/reading materials the day prior to class and individually assigning them to a question. Most everyone in class shows up with the answer for their question. This has helped in-class discussion and has given the more introverted students time to prepare to speak in-front of other students. It has also facilitated deeper discussion when the student are prepared to talk about the topics.

Although this process has not been perfect or easy, the process has provided opportunities for students to be responsible and mature learners. These opportunities are crucial for developing critical thinking in higher education.

In summary, I will continue to provide opportunities that facilitate in-class discussion and develops critical thinking opportunities. Today it may involve a podcast, tomorrow it may involve video conferencing or some other type of teaching method.

-LM

Personal refection

 

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Reflecting on this past semester, I have concluded that I am very critical of myself.

I hold myself and my students to a high standard.

Although this might be frustrating at times, at the end of the day, critiquing myself is what has allowed me to make progress. Having others critique me is also helpful.

This year I am apart of a Teaching and Learning group. Part of this process is getting other faculty to observe a class, and then talk about areas of improvement.

So far in this process, I have gained confidence in my teaching methods. I have learned what other people do in their class, and I have had the opportunity to ask the “tough” questions. My peer group is comprised of three co-workers that I admire for one reason or another. They all have different teaching styles, they all have different strengths and weaknesses, and they all have different on-going issues.

This process has been a lifesaver as a newer faculty. It has allowed me to conceptualize my experience in a different way. Drawing from all the experiences of my teaching and learning group, I have been able to learn and grow from getting to know them.

I plan to continue to critique and improve myself as a professor: to learn from others who have more experience or different experiences than myself; to be secure enough in my teaching to not be wavered by one experience, but sensitive enough to know when to change; to be kind to myself throughout the process; and to be reflective enough to enjoy the journey.

I am thankful God has lead me to this profession. I will do my due diligence to be a good steward of the resources and responsibility that has been given to me.

lm

Collegiality

// Collegiality:

the cooperative relationship of colleagues

One of the best lessons I have learned through this reflection process is to learn from others. Other professors in my department and outside of my department have extended wisdom, and support at times when I needed it.

I used to think that I encountered “unique” issues and situations. I have learned through this reflection experience that we can learn a lot from talking to each other.

It is not weakness to seek others for advice… it is wise to seek those who have the experience and knowledge.

This past week I was approached by a student about a moral/ethical question. I gave her advice, but I could see that it was difficult for her to take the advice because of her current life experiences (don’t worry it wasn’t anything bad or life threatening… it was minor and won’t really make a difference one way or another).  But, the best thing about this encounter is that I saw myself in her. I saw that sometimes I ask advice from more experienced faculty, and sometimes I have a hard time understanding that advice.

I grew a lot from this encounter. It showed me that I can learn a lot from others if I just take the time to understand that my colleagues have that advice to offer. I understand that I am in my own growth process as a professor and that it may be at a different place than other people. AND that’s okay…

I can see myself maturing as a person and as a professional. I don’t do things the same way I did my first year of teaching. In five years, I probably won’t teach the same way I am teaching now. There is nothing wrong with what I am doing now but I hope to learn and to grow.

I am grateful that I am surrounded by co-workers that work together. I hope to continue to grow from using a collaborative approach to evaluate my actions a professor. I plan to be that peer or mentor support to future faculty.

We are stronger when we work together and when we learn from each other.

lm

 

And the walls came tumbling down…

Something extraordinary happened yesterday in my Biblical Interpretation class. Yes, this is the same class I went all she-hulk on last month (see self worth image psalmWhen Empathy Backfires…).

We had recently returned from a chapel service focused on transparency and confession. Several of my Religion students had given short testimonies during the service and had laid bare their souls, recounting their sordid stories and sins, their insecurities and their struggles. They then challenged the chapel attenders to do the same thing, writing their sins and insecurities on themselves with markers as a physical act of confession and honesty.

It was inspiring and thought-provoking and I wanted to make sure that the moment for openness and learning did not pass us by.

self worth image orange guySo instead of lecturing on the grammatical-structural relationships in biblical prose, I asked the students in my class to share the words they had written on their arms. And I went first.

After I explained my struggle with the sinful attitude of selfishness, I confessed that my biggest recurring insecurity is that I feel “other” as a woman called to and gifted for pastoral ministry in a culture that only affirms the pastoral position for men, a fact that continues to ignite resentment and bitterness in my heart toward the church.

And then they shared. In front of their peers, they talked about their feelings of inadequacy, they revealed dark parts of their pasts, and they confessed sins and weaknesses that usually remain  hidden in the locked parts of our souls. They praised God for the healing and deliverance they had experienced in some areas while also recognizing the work that still had to be done. They were raw and real and honest and vulnerable and so incredibly brave that it took my breath away.

It made me think of Jericho.

In Joshua 6, we read the story of the fledgling Israelites who, after having crossed into the land God had promised Abraham generations before, came upon the strong-walled city of Jericho, the first major barrier between them and God’s promise. God gave Joshua and the people detailed instructions that included marching around the walls, blowing trumpets, and shouting in success over the Lord’s promised victory.

We tend to emphasize the great faith that Joshua and the priests and soldiers showed and we celebrate their obedience to God in the face of impossible odds. But we sometimes forget that in order to obey, these Israelites had to be shockingly brave and illogically vulnerable.self worth image

For seven days they marched outside the heavily fortified city, aware that at any moment arrows could fly over the walls to pierce through their bodies and tear away their hopes of entering the promised land. Yet they continued to put themselves in that vulnerable position, with no rocks or walls to hide behind, in order to breach the walls that God told them they would destroy.

Yesterday, my students were as brave and as vulnerable as those Israelites outside Jericho. They put their hearts in the line of fire, exposing parts of themselves to potential arrows of judgment and ridicule and rejection. They did this because they knew they could only experience victory over their sins and their insecurities if they exposed them.

And in the wake of their vulnerability and brave shouts of confession, the walls came tumbling down.

The walls of pain, protection, and pride that guarded their hearts from the world. The walls of denial, competition, and fear that prevent true community among peers. The walls of decorum, distance, and doubt that serve to separate teacher from student. These all started to fall and I realized that I had much to learn from these millenials, these students who both exasperate and inspire me.

Yesterday, my students taught me that true community cannot exist without healing, that healing cannot begin without trust, and that trust can only be earned through vulnerability. They taught me that the toughest battles are not fought with weapons and strategy but with trust and transparency. They taught me that as a community of faith we have many more walls to tear down before we enter the promised land, that kingdom that God has promised us of love and healing, of unity and rest.

jgb

Approval Addiction & Who’s Approval to Seek

 

Quote Eleanor Roosevelt

I recently gave some advice to a student about her first job. She was concerned that she was not doing a good job. I asked her why and she said it was because her students were unhappy. She said they wanted her to be easier, and lower her standards.

My advice: You are not there to make friends. You are there to help them develop and change. You do not need their approval. You need to do a job. The kids may not like you but they are still developing their appreciation of hard work, integrity, and knowledge. You don’t need to be mean… you just need to have good leadership skills, treat them with respect, communicate when needed, and encourage as much as you can. If they can not rise to your expectations, It is not you. You are called to get the “best out of them”… not settle for mediocre behavior.

After I got done giving this advice, I realized that I need to take my own advice. The only approval I need is God’s. He is equipping me and challenging me to be the teacher he would have me to be. I need to seek God’s approval on my life… and that is it. If I am doing all the things he would have me to do, I am satisfied.


Podcast Update: Today we had another flipped class room. Prior to coming to class I had 6 students out of 19 access the podcast. The same 6 also turned in all their work that was due today.

I am finding more and more that good students do what you ask them. They excel with the effort they give, because the effort prepares them for class discussion and the test. I will continue to monitor this number as this class takes the test next week. I am interested to see if more students listen to the podcast as it gets closer to the test, or if the grades will be better with the students that listen to the podcast.

LM

The Next Seven Years

Last spring break I read a book that changed my perspective about students, and myself. It is called “Outliers: The Story of Success” by Malcom Gladwell.

outliers1

We are all an element of our circumstances. Our lives are shaped by the advantages and disadvantages we encounter.

It seems as if we can look back on our past and point out the bad decisions or all the things that maybe didn’t go to our advantage. I see students making bad decisions weekly and sometimes daily. These decisions lead to sometimes lifelong heartache and struggle.

I want to encourage you today to make the sacrifices needed today so that you can have the opportunities tomorrow.

I want to share a little bit of my journey as a ETBU student to a current ETBU Assistant Professor.

When I reflect on my life story, I can’t help but notice how many situations allowed me to have an advantage. For example, I was 1 of only 8 people that were allowed to take dual credit college courses at my high school. We were the first group in the history of the high school to have access to this opportunity. When I came to college, I had 12 college credit hours completed. This allowed me to graduate early. Since I knew I could graduate early, I realized I could take courses over the summer and graduate even earlier. I graduated from ETBU in 5 semesters or 2.5 years.  I then got a Graduate Teaching assistant position and moved into an apartment across from UNT. A year into my Master’s, I got the opportunity to be a House Director at one of the Sorority houses. I was then able to stay somewhere rent free, get paid to live/work, and still keep my job teaching at UNT. I was able to pay for most of my Masters  & PhD degree out of pocket. During my PhD program at Texas Woman’s University, I had 2-3 other part-time adjunct teaching jobs at other universities (in addition to being a Graduate Teaching Assistant at TWU).  I successfully defended my dissertation in Aug. 2012.

So I went from… freshman year at ETBU as a student in Aug. 2004… to Assistant Professor (ABD) at ETBU in Aug. 2011. I was motivated. God gave me the desire to work hard and to take advantage of every opportunity.

I do not apologize for being young. I have worked hard to get here. I still have a lot of work to do.. God is still shaping me.

When reading the book “Outliers,” I noticed how our good and bad decisions take a toll on the direction of our life. It is easy for me to write the paragraph above and leave out all the failures I encountered along that 7 year journey. But the important thing is… I got where I wanted to go. I didn’t stop or give up when I encountered those difficulties.

So when you encounter your next “failure” or “difficulty”… remember that this is a journey… not a sprint… not a race won by only one path…

I don’t know exactly where I will be or what I will be doing in the next 7 years. But I hope I look back on this time in my life and can see how God was shaping me for what is ahead.

LM

What my wrongs (and N.T. Wright) taught me this week

There are weeks when I feel particularly inadequate as a teacher.Bashaw

This week, I attempted to teach the entire book of Romans to my NT Intro students in a 45-minute lecture. I stood in front of my students, some of them Bible-idolizing and some of them Bible-illiterate, and I tried to walk that fine line between teaching and preaching, between information and emotion. I gave the most pertinent background information and I highlighted Romans’ literary features. Then, we discussed the terms and imagery that Paul uses to explain salvation, and I pleaded with them to understand that salvation was more like a process than a one-time decision, that sin was serious and that Christ’s sacrifice was miraculous.

I made a valiant effort but at the end of the class, I still felt like a failure.

How can I sufficiently describe some of the most complex theological concepts in the Bible when I myself still fluctuate on the particulars? How does justification work? Is salvation a past action or a future action or both? Is “once saved always saved” even a biblical principle? What does sanctification look like in the life of the believer?

Isn’t a Bible professor supposed to know the answers to all these questions BEFORE she attempts to teach them to her students? Fail, fail, fail.

Then, for my New Testament Theology class, we read the script of a brilliantly crafted lecture by scholar and bishop, N.T. Wright (“Whence and Whither Pauline Studies in the life of the church?”). In it, Wright presents one of the most eloquent and comprehensive analyses of Pauline thought I had ever read. There is a beauty and clarity of thought in his words, in the simple yet profound truth that he declares. I had to wipe the tears from eyes more than once while I read (Who would have thought that Pauline theology could bring anyone to tears?). I was in awe of him, in awe that someone could not only understand Paul so thoroughly, but could teach the core of his message with such precision and depth.

And it struck me that Wright’s lecture affected me in the way it did because it did not just teach me truth; it demonstrated a truth. N.T. Wright has been studying the Bible, teaching, pastoring (is bishoping a word?), and lecturing for more years than I have been alive.  He did not have such a clear understanding of the intricacies of Scripture twenty years ago. It was a process. Much like sanctification.

Sanctification is the process by which a believer becomes more and more like Christ. We tend to assume this refers to an ethical or moral change, but I think it is more than that. As we study and read and live and love, the Holy Spirit does not just help us grow in character. We also grow in knowledge and understanding of God and Scripture.

If a solid and deep understanding of the Bible and its theology comes only after the long process of learning and teaching, of articulating and correcting, then I have awhile before I will be confident in my knowledge and certain in my theology. And that is how it should be.

I will probably never understand the Bible the way N.T. Wright does. However, I understand more every day.  I am still in the process of sanctification—a sanctification of mind, heart, and life. And although I do not have perfect understanding, I praise God that I have enough understanding  to teach others…others who are just starting the process of sanctification or have yet to begin.